Post by lux127 on Feb 27, 2018 22:05:53 GMT -5
My eyes flickered open and shut a few times. They were greeted by harsh greenish gray light. I pushed the gray blanket up towards the bridge of my nose to provide warmth to my face. Nothing hurt. I felt nothing. I heard nothing. I am nothing.
No memories greeted me. What is a memory? What exists and what does not exist? Something told me that these thoughts were not my own. An instinct perhaps.
I moved my now warm fingers and touched my lips. They were chapped, but I was not thirsty. My chapped lips indicated I must be, but I wasn't on my knees begging for a damn drink. I was still. I was numb.
My fingers moved down towards my arms. My arms had tubes entrapping them and something, some part of me told me not to touch them. If I did pain would be brought upon me.
They were small, see through tubes that had liquid being sucked up by them. The liquid was clear as well. Water. But not just water. Water and salt.
I groaned and flattened myself out on the bed like a pancake. Nothing hurt. I whimpered. Pain means I'm alive, and if I'm not alive then what am I? Dead may be the obvious answer, but death is a complicated enigma.
Against my better judgment, I reached for the tube and yanked on it with a heavy tug.
The needle pierced the tips of my skin as it left it's entry point and I wanted to yelp or scream, but nothing happened. The numbness didn't leave, and it made it near impossible to get up.
I felt pins and needles engulf me, but it didn't burn my body, it just immobilized me.
I layed still.
I wasn't confused, I was nothing. Nothing is confusing here.
I remained here in this room that had no windows. I remained without putting up so much as a fight to move. No clock marked the time passing with a single tick, but I knew time was passing, it's just something locked inside our human brains. Time doesn't need to prove it's passing, we just know. We don't need to prove we're getting older, we just know. The gray hair and wrinkles are just an added bonus.
I saw the door open, but it didn't creak as doors are known to do.
The tubes were picked up from the ground as the liquid dripped down onto the floor creating a puddle. The salt soaked some of it up but the solvent won out.
The tube pierced the same area of my skin it was in before and wiped up with a small square paper towel. Cotton was placed on the area and taped around the tube.
The needle was cold as it was patched up to remain in place. Even with the protection around the area, it felt cold and misplaced. My flesh didn't warm it up, because the needle was unwelcome; an intruder.
The man didn't speak, but I knew exactly what not to do without the verbal instructions.
He stared at me for longer than he should have. Staring too long can be perceived as rude, but I guess he didn't get the memo. He looked pretty young to have a job in a hospital, but then again, I'm a terrible judge of age.
He was pretty short for a guy's height, and he looked geeky with his black rimmed glasses. He wore a lab coat and it made me giggle, reminding me of a television program I used to watch as a child. He had green eyes and his face was dotted with freckles that seemed to connect like constellations. His hair had a red tint to it, but only in the lighting, it's probably just light brown.
He leaned down towards me and frowned. He hid his frown with a smile straight away, but I saw it. "Soon." He said as if he was finishing a previous thought. The word filled me with something that I had never felt before, but then the numb feeling rushed in and my thoughts were carried out by these liquid men. I don't like the liquid men, they're mean, and they make me feel sick. At least, I'm assuming that's what this nauseous feeling is. It feels like my stomach is being ripped from inside out and it moves back and forth, side to side like a wave.
I leaned over the side of the bed and tried to find a waste basket. The boy held onto my arm, and let go quickly after a quick squeeze of comfort.
"The sickness will conclude soon." He handed me a blue basket. I took it and clung onto it as if my life depended on an empty basket. Or soon to be not empty basket.
I felt fire coming up from the deepest points of my insides. It was gagging me. Choking me, and all I could do was give in. I made a choking sound and flinched at the disastrous noise. What came up was inhuman. I produced that? I made a face at it and pushed the fetid scent away from my face.
The vomit was red and black and the color of applesauce all in one. The red and black substance was different, though, it was more thick. I knew that it was blood. My blood. Blood that should really remain inside my body and not out in the open like this.
I reached for the evil tubes, but the boy set a gentle hand on my arm.
"If you do that, then the same process will occur. Your body will have to readjust to the drugs."
The drugs? I had been fooled, I thought it was only water and perhaps salt or even a pinch of sugar.
He circled my arm with his thumb to soothe me a bit.
"This is always the worst part. Soon enough it will stop. It's different for every person, but you seem like a fighter." His favorite word must be soon since he's spoen it an abundance of time in the last few minutes.
I hadn't the slightest idea what he was talking about, but I kept quiet with only my unethical ideas and questions keeping me company.
He stood up to leave me, and my hand weakly clutched his arm. I didn't want him to leave me here for who knows how much longer.
He nodded understanding my silent plea.
"You should get some rest. It will be a strain to you for the first week."
Again confusion flooded me in waves. "Rest and you will be rewarded for your cooperation in the form of food."
My stomach grumbled and I clung onto it. The jerky movement made me wince from a little spike of pain that was soon replaced with that same numb feeling from before. I don't remember ever tasting food before, but a part of me must love food since my stomach grumbled in response to the mere mention of food.
The boy held onto my hand for a second before letting it fall on the bed.
My eyes closed and my vision became blank again.
I don't know how I got here or where here is, but I know that something is deeply wrong. I remember nothing. Am I new? Did I just come face to face with this world or am I old and in a useless state of rest and in transition towards the holy grounds them-self?
I heard footsteps descending back towards the door, but I also heard the descending footsteps linger for a moment or two. Most people wouldn't be able to detect that.
My eyes may be shut but sleep was not taking me from the surface and dragging me down towards a deeper hole. All I saw was this darkness that has yet to claim me. The light coming from insides my eyes transformed into a spectrum made up of vivid blues and harsh purples. They meant nothing to me, but it was a comfort to see them here. They just are distracting me from the pain of darkness. The all consuming light is here, it just isn't ready to claim me. It isn't ready to sweep me towards my dreams, but I knew for a fact dreams only last so long before they turn into nightmares. Every night we have nightmares, but we just don't realize it, we have no recollection of most of them. Dreams are more blocked off from us and it's a rarity to ever have one and to make it last onto the next night.
Instead of counting sheep to put me to sleep, I'm telling myself about the fact that I'll most likely have a non existent dream tonight and an inevitable nightmare. Sweet dreams to me.
My last thoughts fell beneath me and my vision collapsed to a world of green clouds and a smoky backdrop.
I knew what to do with my feet and let them carry me towards the empty building that had glass blown out of it.
My bare feet touched a few of the crystals which had me yelp out in pain. Blood pooled beneath my feet which caused them sticky displessure. Pain lets me know I'm alive. Pain is the only drive to keep me going.
My auburn hair whipped in front of my face as it curled around my neck like a scarf. I didn't even realize my hair was auburn. It was so vivid and red like blood.
I made sure to avoid the rest of the glass, and inched down towards the school. I had no weapon in hand and only a white nightshirt to keep me warm that was drenched in my sweat. The weather was harsh with an inexorable snow fall coming soon.
I gingerly went behind the bush next to the school entrance and opened my eyes more so now than ever.
Scattered on the ground surrounding the streets were toys of all different kinds. Some were charred and some were fresh. The kids who owned these possessions were nowhere in sight.
The snow began pulsing the sky with white. The white then turned to gray. It was not snow that made my body shiver behind the bush, but ashes. They marked my face and I knew that the dead were branding me with bittersweet kisses.
Instead of cowering behind a bush for the dead child or children that are currently resting upon my face, arms, and legs, I got up. I remained low and crouched down every so often to make it to a safe haven, or not so safe haven. My face scrunched up at the unholy sight of the school.
The last thing that caught my eye before I entered the school's off it's hinges blue door was a teddy bear with dirt encrusting it's fur.
A tear escaped as I rushed inside.
The air was cool here, but not as frigid and unwelcoming as the air of outside.
I saw lockers that were smeared with blood and spattered in ash with crude words written on them in spray paint.
I wanted to scream, but that would give my presence away to whomever I was hiding from.
I found one locker that called to me. It was a familiar locker, but it shouldn't be. I've never been here before. It was locked, but I knew the correct combination. 12-39-17. As if on cue, the lock unclicked with a slight sound that had me jump ten feet in the air. Shit, if my curiosity is my downfall I will never forgive myself.
When I opened the locker, I was greeted with the odor of putrescent flesh.
An arm fell out of the locker and crimson red drops of blood dripped towards the grey floors. It painted the floors red and made it's way to my vicinity with a snake like form.
I jumped back and fell down, scraping my over exposed knees.
The locker creaked open and I saw the body inside my locker.
It was me.
My crimson hair gave me away. The blood wasn't even shone on my hair, but I knew it was there blending in with my hair like camouflage.
The body was folded like a paper sack and fit inside effortlessly. That's odd considering how small these lockers are.
I was wrenched back from my disfigured body and pulled up straight. The blood from my cut slithered down my knee and pooled at my feet. I noticed my nails were painted purple with a small daisy on the toenail, and my fingernails were painted black. Such harsh colors told me something about myself. That I was trying to be something I'm not. The black symbolizes how I try to be a rebel and a loner, and the purple tells me that I'm a hidden girl that just wants to fit in. Also the purple made me smile, I think it's my favorite color.
The person holding me in place was strong, and brought me deeper into the school. He screamed danger, but I was unafraid of him. I was quite bored honestly. I could easily break his hold from how he's holding me.
I yawned and then flipped around to push him away from me. I caught a good look at stronghold here and stopped mid breath.
Breathe.
He was a boy, really, and he made my breath hitch just from one look. He became blurry all of a sudden as my t-shirt became doused in glacial water.
I tried to remember his face. His face was gone, but I remember what he was wearing, green army pants, and a green tank top with dog tags wrapped around his neck that had writing etched on it.
I kept my eyes closed tightly, but I couldn't find the boy again. I've never had those feelings before and now they're gone before they even truly began.
I let out a small whimper at the thought that I may never see him again.
"I know you're awake." I heard someone say to me.
It's the same boy from before, the lab coat one.
I opened my eyes to be greeted by the same face.
He had an orange tray of food that I knew but have never experienced before. It came with mashed potatoes, gravy, a biscuit, cranberry sauce, and a few carvings of turkey. There was a clear drink on the side that is known as water.
He set the tray down on the bed. It hovered above me.
The boy tugged a strand of my hair.
I looked at it and noticed the lock was crimson red.
I took a deep breath and didn't let go. An outside source told me that that dream was anything but fake.
The numb feeling came back in heavy pulses. I feel nothing. I am nothing. I am everything. I am a blank slate.
Hi everyone! Thanks for checking out my story!!!!!!!!!!!
If you read the first chapter, and write in the comments your name, age, and stuff about you then you could be a character in this story!!!! Pretty cool, right?
Also voting and commenting really are great motivators to have me finish chapters sooner and to make them worth your while.
No memories greeted me. What is a memory? What exists and what does not exist? Something told me that these thoughts were not my own. An instinct perhaps.
I moved my now warm fingers and touched my lips. They were chapped, but I was not thirsty. My chapped lips indicated I must be, but I wasn't on my knees begging for a damn drink. I was still. I was numb.
My fingers moved down towards my arms. My arms had tubes entrapping them and something, some part of me told me not to touch them. If I did pain would be brought upon me.
They were small, see through tubes that had liquid being sucked up by them. The liquid was clear as well. Water. But not just water. Water and salt.
I groaned and flattened myself out on the bed like a pancake. Nothing hurt. I whimpered. Pain means I'm alive, and if I'm not alive then what am I? Dead may be the obvious answer, but death is a complicated enigma.
Against my better judgment, I reached for the tube and yanked on it with a heavy tug.
The needle pierced the tips of my skin as it left it's entry point and I wanted to yelp or scream, but nothing happened. The numbness didn't leave, and it made it near impossible to get up.
I felt pins and needles engulf me, but it didn't burn my body, it just immobilized me.
I layed still.
I wasn't confused, I was nothing. Nothing is confusing here.
I remained here in this room that had no windows. I remained without putting up so much as a fight to move. No clock marked the time passing with a single tick, but I knew time was passing, it's just something locked inside our human brains. Time doesn't need to prove it's passing, we just know. We don't need to prove we're getting older, we just know. The gray hair and wrinkles are just an added bonus.
I saw the door open, but it didn't creak as doors are known to do.
The tubes were picked up from the ground as the liquid dripped down onto the floor creating a puddle. The salt soaked some of it up but the solvent won out.
The tube pierced the same area of my skin it was in before and wiped up with a small square paper towel. Cotton was placed on the area and taped around the tube.
The needle was cold as it was patched up to remain in place. Even with the protection around the area, it felt cold and misplaced. My flesh didn't warm it up, because the needle was unwelcome; an intruder.
The man didn't speak, but I knew exactly what not to do without the verbal instructions.
He stared at me for longer than he should have. Staring too long can be perceived as rude, but I guess he didn't get the memo. He looked pretty young to have a job in a hospital, but then again, I'm a terrible judge of age.
He was pretty short for a guy's height, and he looked geeky with his black rimmed glasses. He wore a lab coat and it made me giggle, reminding me of a television program I used to watch as a child. He had green eyes and his face was dotted with freckles that seemed to connect like constellations. His hair had a red tint to it, but only in the lighting, it's probably just light brown.
He leaned down towards me and frowned. He hid his frown with a smile straight away, but I saw it. "Soon." He said as if he was finishing a previous thought. The word filled me with something that I had never felt before, but then the numb feeling rushed in and my thoughts were carried out by these liquid men. I don't like the liquid men, they're mean, and they make me feel sick. At least, I'm assuming that's what this nauseous feeling is. It feels like my stomach is being ripped from inside out and it moves back and forth, side to side like a wave.
I leaned over the side of the bed and tried to find a waste basket. The boy held onto my arm, and let go quickly after a quick squeeze of comfort.
"The sickness will conclude soon." He handed me a blue basket. I took it and clung onto it as if my life depended on an empty basket. Or soon to be not empty basket.
I felt fire coming up from the deepest points of my insides. It was gagging me. Choking me, and all I could do was give in. I made a choking sound and flinched at the disastrous noise. What came up was inhuman. I produced that? I made a face at it and pushed the fetid scent away from my face.
The vomit was red and black and the color of applesauce all in one. The red and black substance was different, though, it was more thick. I knew that it was blood. My blood. Blood that should really remain inside my body and not out in the open like this.
I reached for the evil tubes, but the boy set a gentle hand on my arm.
"If you do that, then the same process will occur. Your body will have to readjust to the drugs."
The drugs? I had been fooled, I thought it was only water and perhaps salt or even a pinch of sugar.
He circled my arm with his thumb to soothe me a bit.
"This is always the worst part. Soon enough it will stop. It's different for every person, but you seem like a fighter." His favorite word must be soon since he's spoen it an abundance of time in the last few minutes.
I hadn't the slightest idea what he was talking about, but I kept quiet with only my unethical ideas and questions keeping me company.
He stood up to leave me, and my hand weakly clutched his arm. I didn't want him to leave me here for who knows how much longer.
He nodded understanding my silent plea.
"You should get some rest. It will be a strain to you for the first week."
Again confusion flooded me in waves. "Rest and you will be rewarded for your cooperation in the form of food."
My stomach grumbled and I clung onto it. The jerky movement made me wince from a little spike of pain that was soon replaced with that same numb feeling from before. I don't remember ever tasting food before, but a part of me must love food since my stomach grumbled in response to the mere mention of food.
The boy held onto my hand for a second before letting it fall on the bed.
My eyes closed and my vision became blank again.
I don't know how I got here or where here is, but I know that something is deeply wrong. I remember nothing. Am I new? Did I just come face to face with this world or am I old and in a useless state of rest and in transition towards the holy grounds them-self?
I heard footsteps descending back towards the door, but I also heard the descending footsteps linger for a moment or two. Most people wouldn't be able to detect that.
My eyes may be shut but sleep was not taking me from the surface and dragging me down towards a deeper hole. All I saw was this darkness that has yet to claim me. The light coming from insides my eyes transformed into a spectrum made up of vivid blues and harsh purples. They meant nothing to me, but it was a comfort to see them here. They just are distracting me from the pain of darkness. The all consuming light is here, it just isn't ready to claim me. It isn't ready to sweep me towards my dreams, but I knew for a fact dreams only last so long before they turn into nightmares. Every night we have nightmares, but we just don't realize it, we have no recollection of most of them. Dreams are more blocked off from us and it's a rarity to ever have one and to make it last onto the next night.
Instead of counting sheep to put me to sleep, I'm telling myself about the fact that I'll most likely have a non existent dream tonight and an inevitable nightmare. Sweet dreams to me.
My last thoughts fell beneath me and my vision collapsed to a world of green clouds and a smoky backdrop.
I knew what to do with my feet and let them carry me towards the empty building that had glass blown out of it.
My bare feet touched a few of the crystals which had me yelp out in pain. Blood pooled beneath my feet which caused them sticky displessure. Pain lets me know I'm alive. Pain is the only drive to keep me going.
My auburn hair whipped in front of my face as it curled around my neck like a scarf. I didn't even realize my hair was auburn. It was so vivid and red like blood.
I made sure to avoid the rest of the glass, and inched down towards the school. I had no weapon in hand and only a white nightshirt to keep me warm that was drenched in my sweat. The weather was harsh with an inexorable snow fall coming soon.
I gingerly went behind the bush next to the school entrance and opened my eyes more so now than ever.
Scattered on the ground surrounding the streets were toys of all different kinds. Some were charred and some were fresh. The kids who owned these possessions were nowhere in sight.
The snow began pulsing the sky with white. The white then turned to gray. It was not snow that made my body shiver behind the bush, but ashes. They marked my face and I knew that the dead were branding me with bittersweet kisses.
Instead of cowering behind a bush for the dead child or children that are currently resting upon my face, arms, and legs, I got up. I remained low and crouched down every so often to make it to a safe haven, or not so safe haven. My face scrunched up at the unholy sight of the school.
The last thing that caught my eye before I entered the school's off it's hinges blue door was a teddy bear with dirt encrusting it's fur.
A tear escaped as I rushed inside.
The air was cool here, but not as frigid and unwelcoming as the air of outside.
I saw lockers that were smeared with blood and spattered in ash with crude words written on them in spray paint.
I wanted to scream, but that would give my presence away to whomever I was hiding from.
I found one locker that called to me. It was a familiar locker, but it shouldn't be. I've never been here before. It was locked, but I knew the correct combination. 12-39-17. As if on cue, the lock unclicked with a slight sound that had me jump ten feet in the air. Shit, if my curiosity is my downfall I will never forgive myself.
When I opened the locker, I was greeted with the odor of putrescent flesh.
An arm fell out of the locker and crimson red drops of blood dripped towards the grey floors. It painted the floors red and made it's way to my vicinity with a snake like form.
I jumped back and fell down, scraping my over exposed knees.
The locker creaked open and I saw the body inside my locker.
It was me.
My crimson hair gave me away. The blood wasn't even shone on my hair, but I knew it was there blending in with my hair like camouflage.
The body was folded like a paper sack and fit inside effortlessly. That's odd considering how small these lockers are.
I was wrenched back from my disfigured body and pulled up straight. The blood from my cut slithered down my knee and pooled at my feet. I noticed my nails were painted purple with a small daisy on the toenail, and my fingernails were painted black. Such harsh colors told me something about myself. That I was trying to be something I'm not. The black symbolizes how I try to be a rebel and a loner, and the purple tells me that I'm a hidden girl that just wants to fit in. Also the purple made me smile, I think it's my favorite color.
The person holding me in place was strong, and brought me deeper into the school. He screamed danger, but I was unafraid of him. I was quite bored honestly. I could easily break his hold from how he's holding me.
I yawned and then flipped around to push him away from me. I caught a good look at stronghold here and stopped mid breath.
Breathe.
He was a boy, really, and he made my breath hitch just from one look. He became blurry all of a sudden as my t-shirt became doused in glacial water.
I tried to remember his face. His face was gone, but I remember what he was wearing, green army pants, and a green tank top with dog tags wrapped around his neck that had writing etched on it.
I kept my eyes closed tightly, but I couldn't find the boy again. I've never had those feelings before and now they're gone before they even truly began.
I let out a small whimper at the thought that I may never see him again.
"I know you're awake." I heard someone say to me.
It's the same boy from before, the lab coat one.
I opened my eyes to be greeted by the same face.
He had an orange tray of food that I knew but have never experienced before. It came with mashed potatoes, gravy, a biscuit, cranberry sauce, and a few carvings of turkey. There was a clear drink on the side that is known as water.
He set the tray down on the bed. It hovered above me.
The boy tugged a strand of my hair.
I looked at it and noticed the lock was crimson red.
I took a deep breath and didn't let go. An outside source told me that that dream was anything but fake.
The numb feeling came back in heavy pulses. I feel nothing. I am nothing. I am everything. I am a blank slate.
Hi everyone! Thanks for checking out my story!!!!!!!!!!!
If you read the first chapter, and write in the comments your name, age, and stuff about you then you could be a character in this story!!!! Pretty cool, right?
Also voting and commenting really are great motivators to have me finish chapters sooner and to make them worth your while.